Sunday, October 28, 2007

It Started with a Stupid Skirt™

Does this make me look fat?

GAWD - what a weekend I had in Second Life.

It started out well. The weather in Wonderful Land was good, my hair looked good and I had chosen an adorable outfit. But, when I sat on my new Hopa hippety hop, which was going to ride while doing errands (see my blog entry for Oct. 23), the prim skirt part of my outfit stuck out oddly. "What a great time to try the new smart/intelligent/genius skirt script I had purchased," I thought naively. After over an hour of struggle, the skirt was stuck to my back like a camel’s hump and I could not get it stop clinging there. Since I don’t have an advanced degree in Computer Science, I gave up and just wore it as a Stupid Skirt™ – sans script. Sigh.

I decided to check my makeup in the bathroom mirror before I heading out and ....hey! Where is my new bathtub???? Gone. Into thin grid. I looked under, over, and around my house. Nothing. I searched my inventory and lost and found folders. Nothing. Sigh. (No wonder I cannot get decent homeowners' insurance rates in Second Life.)

Picking up a few things for dinner at M-Mart. (Next to Maddux Furnishings. Be sure to pick up a freebie gift bag filled with furniture and home accessories while you are there.)

I resigned myself to buying a replacement tub, mounted my Hopa and went shopping. I was hopping and browsing peacefully when suddenly, I found myself trapped in a cage! After some struggle and frustration, I managed to track down the bling-happy jerk who had caged me. After telling me to fuck myself several times (Wha...??), he removed it.

At the time, I did not know that if I just TP’d somewhere that I would be free of the cage. Later in the day, this trick was explained to me by an acquaintance whom I had met when they were wandering around a texture shop trying to find out where they could buy a wall. A wall. I kid you not. And when they explained to me how to escape from a cage, they acted like I was the slow one.

When I got back to my house, I realized that I had double purchased several textures. Crapola! (I can only guess that this is the result of brain damage that occurs after riding a virtual hippety hop continuously for over 72 hours.)

I was cursing my waste of Lindens when I glanced out of my living room window and realized that new neighbors had moved in. They had placed a 30m x 30m home on a 30m x 30m plot of land - meaning that this is my new view:

At that point, I decided that I needed some fun, so I decided to try out the new faux-Polaroid camera I had purchased a couple of weeks ago. I had been seduced by the words on the box promising a SPECIAL HUD! and FUN! Well, it turns out that all it actually does is LITTER! Sigh...

Just who is going to pick up this mess?

I left the mess and began working on filing my new textures in my inventory, when a handsome Avatar I had met while bathtub shopping recently (loud sigh...), IM’d me. I had really enjoyed talking with him the previous evening, so I was looking forward to chatting again. Well, he decided that the best course of conversation that day was to tell me all about what he was going to do sexually to another Avatar. How charming. Vomit.

And all weekend long, I kept hoping that my SL boyfriend would log in and hang out with me. But no such luck - he is being grounded by his Real Life (frigid, giant bushed) girlfriend who caught him 'spanking his monkey' while engaged in recreational activities with me. (What? I meant ice skating.)

I prefer to give my monkey 'time outs'. Lolo Pet Shop.

At that point, I was quite bummed about how things had gone.

But then, out of the blue, my friend Alger Meads IM’d me to share a haiku he had written about pistachios. :-)

And somehow, that made everything better.
What bad day? Chillin' with Alger and pondering salted snack themed poetry.

© 2007 All Rights Reserved.


  1. WOW! You have my sympathy -- I've been avoiding smart skits as they end up in my face when I sit down -- and the neighbor's new house:(((

  2. LOL! Samara, TY - at least I know that I am not alone! I can't imagine my skirt shooting over to the next house...oh wait, yes I can. :-P

  3. haha i had the same problem, i decided to test out that skirt script on friday, with disastrous results. and i am a programmer in real life, this thing seriously confused the hell out of me.


    -delaney whippet

  4. Hi all my partner makes the smart skirt and I just wanted to clear up a few things I have no experience with the other skirt scripts so I only speak for the Smart Skirt :) The smart skirt is designed so that the maker of content *designer* does the set up work and the buyer just wears. Meaning when you sit the skirt sits. The designer is supposed to set it up so it is so. Plus can be disabled, etc , when u need to model on stand or special poses. All creations with the smart skirt should have an instruction card on how to turn off etc. If for some reason you want to change the way it sits it is really easy to do so. I just think it is unfair to lump all the scripts into one pile. Also the designer might be the one responsible for not setting skirt up for you guys to wear off the shelf. So instead of using the script name because it is catchy you should name the designer that apparently did not set the skirt up when you sit.

    There are a few systems out there for this some are based off off the open source coding which isn't so easy to use but Aria made hers easier to use with no note cards, it disables itself when sim load is high, and can be turned on or off and locked or unlocked to avoid mistakes. I have sold a lot of skirts using the smart skirt script and have had no ims, no questions and no complaints.

  5. Hi Raven! Thanks for the info. I had actually purchased a stand alone skirt script -- ok, to be honest, I bought every skirt script on the market. I have had absolutely no troubles with skirt scripts that are pre-installed in clothing and I love them - but when I tried to add one of the stand alones to a skirt that had no script, that is when I had trouble. The term Stupid Skirt refers to skirts WITHOUT any script at all - i.e. no brain, no script, just a plain ol' skirt. I'll add that note to my blog to clear up any confusion.

  6. Mmmmz, SL glitches messin' wiff mah skirtz, oh noez!

    Where can I get a smart skirt script? Does anyone know?

  7. To get the smart skirt scritp visit Sinister Scripture at:

  8. I like your descriptions, such as "....engaged in recreational activities with me..", I should remember those when I need to describe some experiences on my blog, lol.
    And that skirt is really original, did not see something like it in SL.;))

  9. LOL! Looker, I think those girls Saturday night were trying to "engage in recreational activities" on your pose balls!

    Wow...LOL - I thought all the comments on today's post would be about monkey discipline!

  10. Oops - to clarify: 'Spanking the monkey' is slang for male 'shaking hands with the Bishop' or "wrestling the eel'... really shouldn't know these things....

  11. *just stared blankly at Tymmerie before patting her on the head*

    It's okay.

    We all read the urban dictionary once and a while.

  12. Thank you for visiting our little shop and giving a monkey a home. :)

    WADE1 Jya

    The LOLO Pet Shop



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