Thursday, December 27, 2007

I Want Your SLex…..

I was recently tagged by the charming Looker Lumet to do a meme about Hot, Avatar on Avatar SLex.
The challenge? To answer these fantasy queries in a way that won’t come across as slutty. Or blow my chances with my current love interest. Sigh…so here goes…
Name the avatar that you would most like to have Second Life sex with for…

1. … their avatar: Elexor Matador. If he is aware of me at all (doubtful) he may have, for a very short time, thought I was stalking him... when all I was doing was looking for the location of ANIMAH at his mall…over and over.
2. … their mind: Trust me – if I admire your mind, I *will* have you – eventually.
3. … their poetic/mystical/creative spirit: Looker Lumet. Most poets/artists are too sensitive to boink properly. (Gawd knows I do not need someone crying after sex. And glitter is a bitch to get out of your sheets) But Looker doesn’t seem like a crier to me.

4. … their social success/success in SL: I have no idea – is this a sleeping your way to the top sort of question? Let’s just say this – if you can get me some good party invites, more blog readers or better customer service over at Linden Labs, IM me and I’ll see what I can do. (Kidding!! I am so just kidding!)
5. … their libido: He knows who he is.
6. … wanting them to go against type for you. Good gawd….if I can’t have someone, then I am obsessed with having that person. So my answer is: someone I can’t have.

7. … and you would go against type for this: Normally, I would go the lesbian route here…but I don’t have any current girl crushes. If you would like to be my girl crush, IM me and I’ll see what I can do.
8. … and you would most want to do a nothing-but-sex week with, who you are not currently having sl sex with: He knows who he is.

9. … and you want a threesome, which two. They don't have to be from the above list, but can be: In the interests of fantasy only, I will answer this. My obsessive compulsive tendencies make me want a matched set of some sort – twin avatars, a guy and his alt, guys who author a blog together, two of the Duran Duran avatars that I am just certain are wandering around the grid somewhere, business partners, Torley Linden and a watermelon avatar, one Gorean warrior from each of two rival cities, etc. Of course, in the immortal words of George Michael, “Sex is natural - sex is fun, Sex is best when it' on one.”
10. … "The forbidden," the one that, you'd like to publicly confess to, but the consequences would be toooooo awful. Examples would be your best friend's partner, a professional contact, someone you know rl who is here… Someone who you want, but have never been able to confess it too. Don't post… Just answer with whether they are online right at the moment that you post your answer: Am I boring? I don’t have anyone that I could name right now as “the forbidden” person/avatar, at least in my Second Life.
11. … nostalgia reasons: He definitely knows who he is.
So there you have it. And now that we have traipsed through my SL sexual fantasy land, I have to decide whom to tag next. I have no idea…but last time I skipped this part, Fate ran over my proverbial dog.
How about this? If you read this blog article and came to the startling revelation that you remembered the rest of the lyrics to that George Michael song, consider yourself tagged.
P.S. If you do not currently have your own blog, please feel free to leave your list as a comment on this article.
© 2007 All Rights Reserved.

Monday, December 24, 2007

Games People Play

Ladies and Gentlemen, I have been thinking long and hard about what I can give you – the very appreciated readers of my blog – as a Holiday gift.
It isn’t easy – you are very difficult to buy for – so picky, I don't know your size and it seems that you have everything already. (And frankly, I suspect that you return everything for store credit anyway.) But then it dawned on me – what about a board game? The readers are fun people and they probably love to socialize. WOW……but which one….??
Then it hit me! I joked a few articles ago about inviting people over to my new house for games of Pictionary. Pictionary!!!! A classic game and one of my favorites! I rule at Pictionary. It is a fact. (For those who are not familiar with the game of Pictionary, it is like a game of charades, except that players draw clues for people to guess rather than acting something out.)

The Second Life version, called Primtionary (which was profiled on SLTV the same weekend I discovered it), follows basically the same rules but is not played on a game board or in teams. One person stands on a stage and is given a clue to build by the host. That person then builds something that will give the audience cues as to what the clue word is. The entire audience “shouts” out guesses to what the clue word is by typing their guesses into the chat bar. The first person to type in the correct answer wins that round and has the opportunity to build the next clue. There are several levels of building difficulty – and each individual builder selects the level they are comfortable with; Easy, Medium, Hard, Impossible and Evil. Each level requires a more advanced level of building skillllzzzz. You are also allowed to use textures and colors to flavor your builds – unless the texture is the clue itself.

The Primtionary event location is Asim Zahra (185, 179, 27). Join the Primtionary Hosts group to get updates and reminders about game times.

Get free, super sexy Primtionary t-shirts (This is the half tee - there is a regular length one also.) at the Primtionary arena!

So, how is it you ask? Fanflippintastic!

I have to admit, though, it took me some time to get used to building in front of people like that. The first time I went, I had planned on just sitting and watching. But, oh my dog, it soon became impossible for me not to guess. It was like my body was possessed. I begin to type answers furiously into the chat bar. “OMG! What am I doing?? Stop!” I told myself, “You are out of practice building!” Then, I heard a peel of bells indicating that the correct answer had been submitted. With mild trepidation, I looked the screen to see who had guessed correctly.

Crapola!! It was me. Of all times for my typing to resemble actual words!! “OH NO!” I shouted out loud. I quickly built a prim antiperspirant stick and a tiny, but powerful, valium tablet and took my place at the front of the arena. I had SL stage fright.

I selected the Easy level, took a deep breath and waited for the host to IM the clue to me. I got the IM. The word was……colon. Colon. My avatar and I stared blankly at the host in total disbelief. That was supposed to be an Easy level build??? How on Earth was I going to construct an intestinal tract out of nothing but cubes and spheres? OMG!!!

…until she IM’ed me that she meant the punctuation mark, not a body part. Whew! Heh.

During that first game, I seriously considered slapping on a gag ball and wrist cuffs in an effort to stop guessing. But, alas, I got another answer correct. In the end, I guessed four answers correctly and built clues four times. It isn’t that I didn't want to build – it is just that I needed to practice a bit more before I felt comfortable and calm. My first day was not the one to get up there.
But now that I know how much fun it is – and how gentle the players are to nervous and beginning players – I know that I shouldn't have worried so much. Since then, I have practiced. I have gotten faster at making little CC’s (for sounds like), arrows to point to specific parts of builds and plus signs to use when I am building parts of words. (Nothing may be pre-made – all elements of your build must be created from scratch on the stage.)

Actually, what I really should practice is calming down – I am a complete spaz up there. There is no reason for me to freak out. There is no time limit. You can be as methodical as you need to be. You can be a brand spanking new builder and take your sweet time. No one will pressure you. They may shout out “funny” answers in reference to the empty stage (void, emptiness, space, etc.), but Avatars can be quite cheeky, really. You don’t even have to pay attention to the answers being shouted out by the audience. The computer takes care of that.

For most games, the prize for a correct answer was $50L. But, no one needs to pay me to play Primtionary. In fact, the organizers might be smart to save up a few Lindens to bribe me to leave someday - after I have taken to attending every single event and sleeping on the SIM in a little tent so as not to miss any action.

Anyone who says that Second Life is all about deviant sex needs to attend Primtionary. Well…just not on Mature Theme Night.

YES!!! I said MATURE THEME NIGHT! OMG. All R, X, , XX, XXX, and Y words! (Yes! Y! It will be that naughty!) I can only imagine the absolute delight of being plopped in front of my PC with a chilled box of wine at my side and the stadium full of SL friends while we play together on Mature night. (I will post a note on my blog when I find out the schedule for the next Mature night.)

See the clue below? What do you think it is?

Obviously, it is a ‘dungeon’…. and that is what I guessed. And I was right. Of course, now I have had to suffer being teased about being a pervert ever since by f00 Barbosa, who had gone to the game with me. Hey - I can’t help what is top of mind for me. :-P

So, I hope that I will see you at a game soon! I’ll be the one in the ball gag.

© 2007 All Rights Reserved.

Friday, December 14, 2007

Hey Deanie - what do you want for Christmas?

The adorable Myllie Writer of Persona tagged me for the new Christmas meme traveling around the SL blogosphere.

Question 1: What is the one thing you always wanted for Christmas as a child, but never got. Even now, as an adult, it would be pretty cool if you got it.

I have no idea. Probably a guarantee that I would marry Shaun Cassidy when I grew up. (Which might still be pretty kewl. Who knows?)

There were only two Christmases for which I was ever disappointed. When I was 4 years old, I desperately wanted a specific Barbie doll that I had seen on television. She did all of these cool gymnastics poses and flips. My Grandparents got me a Barbie - but it was the wrong one. I could not for the life of me figure out how they had messed up the request.

The second time was when I got my first 2-wheeled bike from my parents. My younger sister got a 2-wheeler that year also, but hers had training wheels while mine did not. I was a little miffed about that oversight since, quite obviously, it meant that they liked her better.

Question 2: What is the one thing you want for this Christmas for myself?
I can’t stop at just one. (1) I’d like for a headhunter to call with a fantastic new job. I am putting out feelers for new opportunities now. It would probably end up meaning a move and I’d have mixed feelings about that, but I can use the life shake up. (2) I would like more nieces and/or nephews. But, my sisters and their husbands/boyfriends do not share this sentiment right now, however, so I think I am out of luck.

Question 3: What would you wish for, if the sky was the limit and nothing was impossible?
The sky is the limit? Wow. I won’t state the obvious – like wealth and health for myself and my loved ones because those are givens. So, for my Second life, how about for my new SL love interest to be free to date soon and some Second Life fame that I can parlay into some kewl party invites? Oh, and I'd like my panda bear to forgive me for pouring hot wax on him the other day (see yesterday's blog entry).

For my First Life, an additional 8 inches of height and to never age would be much appreciated. Amen.

And, now I am openly taunting fate by breaking this chain. :-P

© 2007 All Rights Reserved.

Thursday, December 13, 2007

Bad Poetry, Good Gifts & A Merry Grid-mas - PART 2

Yesterday, after Second Life Santa was done putting his feet all over my furniture, he gave me some gift ideas to pass along to you. He specified that these were items that were transferable and were likely to delight most Avatars.

So let's get started!

Reach through your computer cables to touch that special Avatar - and not in creepy way either - by sending a Real Life gift through Starfruit. ( You can choose from a variety of gift items (wine is available as a gift choice for some European countries). Here's is how their web site explains the process: 1) you order a gift at the Starfruit location in-world and pay with Linden dollars; 2) You are given a virtual gift to give to the other person's Avatar; 3) The recipient can then provide the company with a Real Life mailing address, to which Starfruit then sends a real version of the gift. (They state on the web site that your privacy is protected.) So, now you can send flowers, chocolates or jewelry to that married, 47 year old, construction foreman named Harold - whom you know only as Lola69 Thorne (no relation) - you big romantic, you.

Don't be jealous of my Chia Pet. You can get one at
Kitsch & Tchotchkes. You'll also find scripted pez dispensers, paintings of dogs playing poker and more. But, for some reason the crying Elvis painting is no transfer....[wanders off shaking head]

Pick up a little something for yourself. Grab some FREE movie posters from the Museum of Motion Pictures. You know you need a Rambo V poster over you bed. There is a nice selection of free holiday movie posters right now, too – great for party d├ęcor! [Note: These posters are non-transferable - but I wanted to let you know about them since they are kewl and FREE.]

Taff's Sports has a massive selection of transferable, men's and women's items for the Rugby and Football/Soccer fans in your SLife. They can even do custom items. I found team logo and country flag themed uniforms, t-shirts, beach towels, swim wear, baseball caps, etc.

Fans of American football, basketball and baseball teams can find gift items – including these adorable National Football League Christmas stockings, door mats that greet you with a team cheer, bedding, lamps, jerseys, hats and more at 1 NFL Zone. Yes - you can be as much of an obnoxious Super Fan in Second Life as you are in Real.

You've seen this before, but it is a favorite of mine. You can get it at Corduroy. Fill it up with pictures and then change them with a click of the mouse. Make it special by adding a few pictures of your own before giving it to friends.

From Pink Floyd to Radiohead to the Red Hot Chili Peppers to Daft Punk to the Beatles, you can find transferable, unisex t-shirts for your favorite fan. Get them at Pop ART.

Next, we have some items for what I am quickly discovering is the major demographic in SL: Star Wars fans employed as computer programmers. Are you dating one of these people? Here is how to knock their socks off:

Step 1: Stop by the gift vendor at Furious Star Wars Avatars. Grab him/her a weapon and an outfit. I suggest you get him/her the Han Solo/Princess Leia outfit. For your benefit.

Step 2: Slip into the Han Solo/Princess Leia outfit you picked up for yourself while you were there.

Step 3: Tell him/her that for their Christmas gift you are agreeing to make that
Star Whores machinima they are always talking about.

Step 4. [Insert penis/light saber comparison joke here].

The Shopping Force is strong with this one, Vader...

A feather boa can make a fun stocking stuffer. Or a terribly sexy shirt. Or a hat. Or a broach. Or a pterodactyl. Find boas in a plethora of colors at caLLiefornia.

Ummmm- it's starting to get hot in here. Good thing you have a scripted fan from *Digital Eyes to keep you cool. The fanning animation is terribly elegant. Many colors of cool available.

No pandas were harmed during the making of this blog. Look - he is even smiling a little. This transferable sex candle from [ o ] R O P E W O R X [ o ] could turn out to be a gift for you, too. That is, if you or your stuffed animals are into that sort of thing.

Hey, you have to stop cyber-ing every once in a while to eat, drink and sleep. Take a lunch box to your desk and streamline at least one of these tasks. Illuminare has many varieties - from Superman to My Little Pony to Transformers. They are scripted so your Avatar can carry them. I am still searching for SL Fruit Roll-ups and little cartons of milk.
So, there you have Second Life Santa's quick picks for this Grid-mas. And, I am fairly certain that my calling it Grid-mas makes the Baby Jesus cry. So, I'll end this two part article the same way I started it - with an apology.
© 2007 All Rights Reserved.

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Bad Poetry, Good Gifts & A Merry Grid-mas - PART 1

Run, don't walk, over to !BF! Boing Fromage and get yourself and your holiday party guests some customizable Hello My Name Is.... name tags for $1L each. A transferable version is available.

NOTE: First, I am going to apologize. This is a very long blog entry. I got carried away. So, I broke it into two parts. You're welcome. Apologies, also, to Clement Clarke Moore, whose masterpiece, A Visit from St. Nicholas, inspired this attempt.


Twas two weeks before Christmas, as I strolled ‘cross the grid,
Pondering my Avatar friends as I did.

As I TP’d to shops, I spied Old Saint Nick!
“Santa!” I IM’d, “Please help me! And quick!”

He nodded at me and then followed me home,
where I poured him an ale and he blew off the foam.

“Tell me Dear Santa– as much as you’re able.”
He kicked off his boots; put his feet on my table.

“How do I determine who is naughty or nice?
Please, Santa Baby – give me some advice!”

“You see, my dear Tym, there is a system I use
to rank their behavior and that helps me choose.

“Not ‘naughty’ or ‘nice’ – that’s so old fashioned!”
His voice grew quite loud - he was very impassioned.

“Let’s take the Pearl Clutchers – hard to ignore.
Yes, they may behave, but, oh what a bore!

“They always wear undies – sometimes multiple layers!
They delete empty boxes left by other players.

They stay the same sex in real life or Secon’.
They need a reason to be bad – this much I reckon.”

He opened his mouth and out came a sound.
He turned a bit red and set his glass down.

“Santa!” I gasped, “Let’s keep this classy!”
“Sorry, my dear – ginger ale makes me gassy.

“Following next, we have the Quite Nice.
They’ll help you in sandboxes – don’t have to ask twice!

“They give newbies free things and share camera tips.
They’ll line up your textures and help you fix scripts.

“They spend time in dungeons and trolling sex clubs.
And while they don’t own whips, they’re still mean to Subs!

“Now, we have those who Could Go Either Way.
They were gracious last week, mischievous today.

“They know all the rules for the Gorean cities,
but they only go there to see exposed kitties.

“They correct all their typos when in open chat.
They pronounce LOL on Voice – what’s up with that? :-P

“Get them some gifts that expose them to vice,
and then you’ll find out if they’re naughty or nice!

“Then, we have those who are Just Sort of Bad.
They’re easy to shop for – but they make me mad!

“You know who they are – ‘cause they crash all the sims
with bling and accessories that use up the prims!

“They spy on their neighbors when they’re having SLex.
They change the permissions on all your objects!

“You know I’ve been saving the BEST for last!
If you want a good time, they are a blast!

“The Curl Your Toes Naughty!” he chuckled aloud,
“They’re having more fun than the Lindens allow!”

I looked up at Santa with a questioning glance.
“Tym, Dear! Their Avatars never wear pants!

“They’ve got pose balls set up for a marvelous time,
and the way that they hold you is just so divine!

“They email you pictures of their naughty parts,
and their Role Play skills are way off of the charts!”

He got up to leave and I shook his hand.
I wasn’t quite sure – did I misunderstand?

I pondered the rankings, best as I could recall.
“Santa, the BEST you ranked NAUGHTIEST OF ALL!!”

He smiled, leaned in closely - almost touching my head,
“It’s Second Life, Tym, Dear. I like bad instead!”

© 2007 All Rights Reserved.

Tuesday, December 4, 2007

Come and get yours....

Free Hugs Video
My Friend and fellow Dream Studios model, Marlee Theas, passed this sign and link to me and - I have to tell you - it MADE MY DAY.

If you want a sign of your own - just IM me and I will send one to you (you can share it with your friends, too). Let's share the LOVE in Second Life!!

© 2007 All Rights Reserved.

Monday, December 3, 2007

8 Fricking Facts About Moi

There is a "chain letter" circulating among the SL bloggers right now. I was tagged by Willow C. and Looker Lumet (I am too lazy to go back and see who tagged me first.) to respond the the letter, but rather than get annoyed, I am strangely relieved that I didn't get skipped.

Anyhoo, each tagged person is supposed to share 8 random facts and/or quirks about themselves. So here we go:

1. My favorite color is periwinkle. I would marry it if I could.

2. One of my favorite foods is a homemade flour tortilla, toasted and spread with Armour Potted Meat. Laugh if you will, but it is Manna from Heaven for me.

3. I got my ears pierced when I was 5 days old by an Aunt with a needle and thread. That is the only piercing I have.

4. I "misplaced" my virginity in a bedroom in the first floor suite of the Darley South dormitory on the campus of the University of Colorado.

5. This is what happens when you are set free after 12 years of Catholic school.

6. I am the eldest in a family of all girls. I am still haunted by the constant squealing, fighting, crying and screaming.

7. I am keenly aware that Mom and Dad were trying for boys. This will impact my selection of nursing homes for them someday.

8. I hate, hate, hate sad films and the entire "chick flick" genre. This leaves only Adam Sandler movies. So, I don't go to the theater at all unless I am shot with a tranquilizer dart first and then carried inside. This happens surprisingly often.

9. I have the absolute worst time making decisions. I cannot stand to close my options. As a result of my indecision, I have: 2 Bachelor's degrees; 2 Master's degrees; 0 tattoos; 7,985 paint swatches taped to the walls of my home; and 0 husbands. It is also the reason there are 9 things on this list of 8 things.

Now, since I am breaking this chain, I fully expect to be cursed within a week's time, as is the tradition with chain letters. But I don't mind, since that will give me material for a new blog article.

10. I am optimistic like that.

EDIT: I realized that I cannot throw away the opportunity to tag the gals on the Dream Studios blog! So, Angel Horner, Katoria Stevensen, Veronica Krasner and Marlee Theas...TAG!

© 2007 All Rights Reserved.

Sunday, December 2, 2007

Is that a Blog Post in Your Pocket, or.... ?

Hi...I wanted to make sure that you saw the articles the Y Me Men wrote after I left a rambling, stream of consciousness-style comment on their blog begging for advice on shopping for and giving gifts to men. (I referred to this request in my last post.) Despite their fears that I would break into their homes if they did not write it, I was really only contemplating a prank phone call or two.

The result of my whining is a two-parter that details advice for handling gift giving and lazy men (LOL) written by Catero Revolution. (Thank you so much, Catero!)

If anything, I goaded them into posting more often. And that, Y Me Blog Fans, is your early X-Mas gift from me.

© 2007 All Rights Reserved.


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