Monday, January 26, 2009

He says he doesn't blog.

My darling husband, Jerremy Darwin, has posted to his blog instead of writing a 5 page comment on one of my blog posts. I swear that man can be long-winded sometimes.

The topic? He finally got around to making a New Year's resolution and a prediction for 2009. Enjoy!

EDIT: He is on a roll today! He just posted his answers for the 16 Things meme that was making the rounds. (He referenced my 16 Things post a few times, so if you need to refresh your memory you can look it over below.)

Sunday, January 25, 2009

SLab Rats

Some days, I wonder how many grad students are busy reading my blog when they should be doing more important things…like drinking.

But apparently, their graduate school mentors *do* drink – which causes them to approve thesis topics based on the activities of people who enjoy virtual worlds.

As a result of this thirst for knowledge – certainly not the desire to play games in lieu of studying - I have been sent survey after survey after interview request to reveal the details of…drum roll please….my romantic SLife.

How ridiculous. I will be the first to tell you that I did not join SL for romance. I joined strictly for the sex.

I am kidding, of course. But, you can’t tell that to a grad student.

I am not thrilled with the perception that Second Life is a dating service or a brothel. These studies never ask about the homes I have built, or the parties I have thrown, or the friends I have met from across the world.

Annoyingly and without exception, every survey has had at least one question that asks me to explain SLex to them. So this is how I explain it: "When a boy avatar and a girl avatar and the men behind both avatars love each other very much, they rez some pose balls and text dirty to one another until a wife/girlfriend walks into the room and asks what in the hey is going on. The end."

Another complication with such surveys is that they inevitably want to know all about my SL husband. But, I want to protect his privacy in SL as much as possible. Well, as much as possible with his name in the partnership box on my profile. And while wearing a ‘Mrs. Jerremy Darwin’ tag above my head. And while gushing about him in my profile picks. And while putting his name all over my blog. And while wearing my ‘Jerremy’s Bitch’ t-shirt. Wow...I am really bad at this.

Anyhoo, if you should receive a survey about your SLove life from a naïve but terribly eager grad student, I encourage you to fill it out…and then run it through your shredder. After that, email them back and ask them to pick a new topic for their thesis.

Because we, my fellow Second Lifers, are not SLab rats.

Saturday, January 17, 2009

Do you see what I am saying?

The lovely Emerald Wynn has a rather ironically titled blog (Emerald's Eyes) considering her recent and shocking admission that while in SL, she can't see squat!!

In her post - "Why I am Not A Fashion Writer" - she explains that one of the reasons for not being a fashion blogger is that her computer is simply not powerful enough to meet the heavy technical demands of the sophisticated game of Barbies that we call Second Life. She even includes a lovely assortment of photos demonstrating what she sees (or actually, doesn't see) at fashion shows.

I thought about her situation for a while. And then I realized that in actuality, the perfect Second Life fashion blogger would have the same exact kind of PC as Emerald has – the kind of PC that makes new Second Lifers give up and leave the game in droves after one or two frustrating days of lag and waiting for things to rez.

This new kind of blog would fill a niche by helping people with the-guy-at-the-computer-store-told-me-that-this-was-more-than-adequate-for-web-surfing-word-processing-and-running-PhotoShop computers to actually enjoy the SL experience that they are having. The new blog would help to make prim lemons into refreshing lemonade.

Hmmmm…..we’d have to think of a clever name for it – like Gray Cache or Fashion Ration. The blog would review fashion, hair, skins and accessories the way that, in my guestimation, 75% of the people who try Second Life see these items -- as gray blobs, fuzzy system clothing and unrezzed sculpty sphere’s worn by bald, gray people. And every day the blog would feature the newest gray blobs, fuzzy system clothing and unrezzed sculpty spheres.

There are so many advantages to writing a blog like this! It would be incredibly easy to put together a “Look of the Day” since everything would always match. Hair reviews would just be a look at the newest bald bases. Skin reviews could use the same photo over and over again.

The blog would give out handy style tips like, "Never try to change clothing unless you have a solid half of an hour to kill!" And every season, the writers of the blog would declare things like “Gray is the new black!”, “Gray is the new plaid!” and “Gray is the new gray!”

Occasionally, the writers would do an interview with an especially stylish cloud of mist.

I really think Emerald is onto something!! I just hope that, even with her lousy computer, she can see what I am saying.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Sweet 16

So, there is this "16 Things" challenge going around and I practically had to beg to be tagged for it, for cripes sake. Finally, I was pity tagged by Alicia Chenaux, Bettye Dugan, and Meara Deschanel.

Now, I don't quite know the rules and I can't find them anywhere. Rumor has it that you are supposed to write 16 things about yourself and then post a picture of yourself from RL (IDK...that is just what I heard.) But, I will probably make up some rules along the way.

I now present 16 facts about myself in SL:
  1. I used to have man hands. By used to, I mean last week. Thank heaven for slider bars.
  2. I got my first condo when I was three weeks old. I was amazed - simply astonished - with one feature of the unit: one-way windows! I thought my landlord was a genius. I could not figure out how this astounding feature worked. [insert eye roll at my naiveté here]
  3. I am writing this while sitting in my office at my home in Ghambt.
  4. My half-rez day is February 20th.
  5. I fly everywhere I can - even in places with obviously low ceilings and many obstacles to traverse. I am stubborn that way. The 'thud' sound of me hitting my head on things is like a drum solo sometimes.

  6. My husband and I have four adorable little cottages down by our boardwalk that we have no idea what to do with right now. Stores? Apartments? Stores? Apartments?
  7. One of the many reasons that I rarely wear prim eyelashes is that I have a huge fear that they will not rez for people and I will just have big gray rectangles above and below my eyes. So, I just set my "system" eyelashes to what may be a laughable length and hope for the best.
  8. I once bought an expensive fat pack of sandals with the toes attached. However, when I put them on at home, the Frankenstein-esque nature of the shoes grossed me out so much that I threw the entire fat pack away.
  9. I own a dog that makes my legs go funny. So, I rarely take him out for walks.
  10. I don't have an AO...just a 'sexy walk' attachment. (I know!! Gasp!) So, I stand around like a newbie most of the time. Did you know that most newbies spend half their time standing with their feet more than shoulder width apart with their hands on their hips? That's a pretty confident pose for people who are probably still wearing system hair.
  11. The coffee cup on my desk has been warm and steamy for about 6 months now.
  12. I am still trying to rid my inventory of all of the freebie jewelry I picked up when I was a newbie at the SL Jewelry Expo, held in 200 B.C. Stuff keeps popping up out of nowhere!
  13. In our living room, we have two texture changing couches with pillows and a matching chair that can all be made into 1000 different combinations of colors and patterns...and I always use plain ol' beige with no pattern.
  14. I just melt when my husband, Jerremy, wears a construction outfit when he builds or a wet suit when he works in our pool or water features. Now, if he would only get a farmer outfit to wear when he works in our garden, I'd be all over him.
  15. I am so proud that I figured out how to make an object giver (to hand out swim bracelets for the pool at Starting Point) all by myself. [insert eye roll here in about 3 months]
OK...those are the first 15 things about me. Now for the picture of myself from RL:

Picture courtesy of my favorite 4 year-old artist, Mia. BTW, those are not eyeglasses in the picture...she just gave me huge, buggy eyes for some reason. And I appear to be running for the door.

And finally, the last fact about myself...

16. I don't like to ruin the magic of Second Life. :-P

Saturday, January 10, 2009

Under there.

Laundry day at the Thorne-Darwin household.

I am going to be a little naughty today...mostly because I am going to mention my unmentionables.

Second Life is a wonderful place for undergarments - it always fits perfectly, never stretches out, the underwires of bras never come loose to stab you, you never get holes in your favorites, and you will never run out of clean ones. However, if we are ever in a car accident in Second Life, our mothers will be terribly angry at us. We will not be wearing the clean pair she advises...most likely, we will not be wearing any at all.

Check now. Peer down your shirt or pull out your waistband and have a look. Go ahead, I'll wait.

A whole lotta nothing, right?

Well, to be perfectly honest, you don't really need to wear underthings in SL. If you wear it, you probably intend to take it off almost immediately. And sometimes, especially if you happen to be on your year-long honeymoon [cough], you don't even have time to put any on.

I personally own folder upon sub-folder upon sub-folder of undies that I rarely wear.

But because I would like to be a little more of a lady (stop laughing) and actually get some use out of the thousands of Linden dollars worth of underclothes that I have purchased, I will say a sentence you will almost never hear in Real Life: I am challenging myself to wear underwear every day.

The only downside of my little challenge? I'll be adding a delicates pile to my SL laundry. (/me reminds herself to find SL Woolite.)

On the face, this challenge does not seem that... ummmm... challenging. The items I choose do not have to be fancy - just a panty and bra will suffice. But, as you may have noticed, the cut of most Second Life women's clothing does not lend itself to wearing such items.

I am still haunted by the memory of the day in 5th grade when little Stephen Brown's Spiderman Underoos were spotted by a classmate as he sat at his desk. He never lived it down and, last I heard, he was living his mother's basement playing WoW all day long. As I do not wish the same fate for myself, I must avoid having my intimate apparel peeking out of my clothing. Clearly, It is worrisome for me that most of my pants, shorts and skirts show an awful lot of rear cleavage. There will be times when I'll need to use strategy and planning worthy of a military offensive in order to wear some outfits.

In fact, there may be occasions when you see me on the grid and you'll wonder what is under there.

Thursday, January 1, 2009

I am not a fashion blogger, but...

I will start by repeating the title of this post - in no way, shape or form am I a fashion blogger. That said, I was pretty happy about the New Years outfit I put together. I was especially tickled that it is a mash-up. Yup! No pre-matched outfits for me! (Even as a child, I dared to mix my Garanimals - unabashedly wearing a zebra with a giraffe.)

Here I am after stumbling home at the ungodly hour of 10:30 PM:

The outfit is a combination of the top of the Last Call "Fashionista" dress, a LeeZu Baxter "BlackFur FlexiSkirt" and my breasts.

And WOW! Leezu Baxter was not kidding when she said that skirt was flexi. While I was dancing, it practically bounced and "flexied" from my chest down to my knees. Let's give a little round of applause to my glitch pants, which worked very hard to save my reputation last night.

So there you have it: a blog post from me that is finally worthy of being on the fashion feed. :-P


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